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    Public Transport-a-Potty

    By Sparky | May 16, 2008

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    As I’ve mentioned before, I take the train to work right now. One of the worst parts of my day involves the thick acrid stench that is always present on the train, wafting in green squiggly waves from the grimy closet they call a bathroom.

    I think the most unfortunate part of it is that people don’t generally want to use the john on the train. With all the jumping and jerking around that the train does, it gets relatively difficult to aim, much less keep your ass properly centered. This leads to a problem. The only people that use the pot are the ones that REALLY have issues. I’m talking about the Green Bay native that had too much beans and sourkraut heaped on his wurst at the hofbrau. I’m talking about the dude who has 3 bran muffins for breakfast and washes them down with mulch and tree bark. I’m talking about the drunk guy coming home from the Giant’s game who isn’t able to properly aim at the two toilets floating in front of him.

    It gets really annoying to eat your breakfast when the only seat available is the one directly across from the crap pot. I think they should put the bathrooms only in special cars with the loud cell phone talkers, the overly zealous spandex-wearing bikers, the noisy gum chewers and the “I’m going to use copious amounts of cologne to cover up the fact that I didn’t shower” guy. I’d be a real shame if that car got left behind somewhere. Locked.

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    Topics: Rants, Sparky | No Comments »